Doctor Who: The Ninth Doctor On-Going #2

I won’t embarrass the creative team.

There’s a bit in the blurb at the front that suggests sending your thoughts on the comic to the website. I’ve been banned from enough websites thanks.

This issue reads as if someone was dictating the script in Mandarin over a dial up Skype call to a deaf person whose only knowledge of the Doctor is that he occasionally says “fantastic”. The story makes fuck all sense, why are the Sliveen posing as the Doctor in the first place? Why take Rose when you already have a partner? Like a brothel after the fleet comes in, it’s full of gaping holes. The dialogue flows reasonably but stumbles on the pacing and occasional proof reading gaff.

The art is like someone attacked the page with a black crayon. The inking is so thick it couldn’t pass a remedial maths exam.  Up close, the likeness aren’t too bad once you get past all the black lines but the further away the shots get the less and less the characters look like human beings let alone the actors they are based on. Weird body angles, a distinct lack of details and a strange crowd shot that looks like someone was trying to dig through the Bristol board with a black marker, making you think the creative team were off sick so they got the care taker to fill in, only he’s got hooks for hands and he did it all by dipping the tips into buckets of India ink and then took out his lifetime of frustration over not being able to masturbate on the page.

It’s visually unappealing, tedious, lacks any drama BUT I am grateful for this opportunity to cut loose though.

Don’t just avoid it, mock it openly.

0 Stars

Written by Cavan Scott with 5 covers to choose from by artists Mark Wheatley, Blair Shedd, Adriana Melo and Stephen Byrn

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